warpednormal's Diaryland Diary

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I always thought I'd be single forever. That that was my more natural state, my baseline, my comfort level. I would maybe have kids of my own, a dog, some really wonderful friends.. but a partner, that was a bit out of the question. I counted the years that would go by, the multiple romances that never quite fit, the heartbreak, the worry and anxiety that I was nearing 30 and had yet to find someone I felt like myself with.

Now here I am, living in quarantine with another person who isn't my family. I make the bed and he makes the coffee. I saw him cry for the first time the other day, the weight of losing his job and trying to buy a house in Australia overwhelming him at once. I held his shaking body and I felt like I was sharing the load of the world with him. We make each other laugh every single day. We encourage each other to meditate, to exercise, to listen to podcasts and be healthy people all the while drinking wine every other night or consuming an edible while watching cheesy 80s films at night. There are things that worry me- yesterday he went mountain biking with two friends and I worried he would bring home some viruses, but we're doing the best we can in this situation. For him to go from 14 hour work days to nothing must be difficult.

Anyhow.
I hope you are all celebrating the little things.

8:41 a.m. - 2020-04-02

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