warpednormal's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- - had my final exam today for the adult/older adult semester. feel like i've failed. but i always feel like i've failed. that's what you get for being a failure. you just expect it. here's to hoping i didn't.
when i went over though, they were all gossiping about people they disliked and were annoyed with and thought were ugly in our class...and i just thought...wtf. i barely think about this stuff. rarely do people annoy me i find, i'm not sure why. its a waste of energy to place so much hate towards someone. talking about them and thinking about all the things that annoy you....you know what's weird? i've realized that i've always ended up being the one to hang out with the "misfits". all through high school, i was always the one hanging out with the one everyone hated. for example, once they made a hate page on facebook dedicated towards vicki and all the things they found annoying about her. and tony, no one likes tony! At least, that's what everyone believed. except me. i was always their best friend. and jena, i remember sitting with my group of so called friends and listening them speak for hours about all the things they found annoying about her. i'm not sure. that might say something about what other people thought about me... but i get it. there's something strangely satisfying and self-fulfilling when we talk down about others, as if we're better, as if our mere presence was a gift to them. as if we never are the annoying sons of bitches to anyone. but yeah. vicki wants me to come to the island to watch the girl's rugby game. i said yes. it should be kind of fun or incredibly boring given i don't even know what rugby entails with regards to rules and such...but who cares. it should be super fun watching hot girls get dirty and rough on each other (in spandex nonetheless!!) sigh. i'm tired. anyway, i'm gonna go to my room now and pace frantically around the bed and continue psychotically checking my grades until i find out if i've made it through the first half of nursing school. such is life. 11:26 p.m. - 2010-04-13 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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