warpednormal's Diaryland Diary

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Music is my substitute for love

maybe i just like feeling special, but my heart just filled with something great when the kids told me how much they would miss me.

doesn't it make you sad that we can no longer make these kind of bonds with people in a matter of days? to be so open and so free with someone you've met only an hour before?

spent the rest of the day with tony downtown. we went all the way to one of the places with the big screen to watch the canada vs swiss team but they were playing curling instead. like what? and so we went back to my apartment, ate some pizza and gatorade and watched as our team got slightly owned for a bit.

i also saw geoff at the station. it was the first time my heart skipped a beat in the longest, longest time. he's my high school crush haha, and so me and tony spent most of the time talking about kids from high school. i spent a lot of the time talking about david too unfortunately, and i hate myself for it.

i shouldn't have rested my head on tony's shoulder. i'm so afraid i'm pushing him to feel something i could never return for him. he's amazing, and funny and strange and mesmerizing, and i hope he finds a woman who can truly understand him..but...sometimes i fear that woman would have to be incredibly selfless, patient and without an inch of shallowness. truly, and girls...people like that are rare.

yeah. not much else. i'm getting really sick. eyes watering, nose running all over. i just need to crash. i was going to hang out with so many people yesterday. i'm supposed to see corey or robert today, but neither has called or asked. who cares? i don't


i might have invited myself to a rugby party on saturday. bad idea. i can't stand the thought of falling out of love with myself. (those guys have a knack for pushing me off my pedestal)

seriously, though i feel like i'm dying. sneezing like crazy.

good night universe. don't be a bitch.

10:03 p.m. - 2010-02-18

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