warpednormal's Diaryland Diary

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yesterday was highly whatever.
i saw robert, but i am hugely convinced he finds me as boring and as uninteresting as an unsharpened pencil. really. we went all the way to the university because he had to get some stuff for his radio station, and then we ate lunch at some mongolian grill place. thoughout the entire thing, i couldn't think of anything cool or interesting or funny to say. i let him do all the talking. i feel like i'm one big daniel to him, just completely insecure and dependent. i do fully understand that i need to grow up a little, but he makes me feel like a fuckin 5 year old half the time.
afterwards, i went to see vicki because i was feeling all shitty about that, and she instantly made everything feel a lot better. she said something about me being the only person she never would find an excuse not to hang out with. that i am amazing and fully deserving of a man who sees that too. and so what if he doesn't feel me or find me interesting? so what, if it doesn't work out it doesn't work out. no need to dwell on that shit forever.

anyway, we met up with jer and helling and then we all went to matt's house and played some rock band and talked about skinny polish dicks and flailing vaginas. haha. you should have been there.

it didn't make me feel much better though because those guys also have the tendency to make me feel ridiculously inadequate and unsure of myself.

anyway, lots of studying to be done. another party tonight. blah blah blah.

i'm feeling awfully restless and lonely right now, but whatever. too many things need to be done.

3:01 p.m. - 2010-01-16

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