warpednormal's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- - and i almost cried today during our "group session," everyone shared their stories of travel and master thesisis and helping little kids in india and working with women in prisons, and everyone was so expressive and excited and accomplished... and i thought i knew what i was going to say. i was going to tell them all about my volunteer work and about my hospital experiences and all that generic stuff i spew out when someone asks me what i've done with my life, what got me here, what makes me who i am..blah dee fucking blah ... until it got to my turn. i don't know what happened, but i couldn't finish a sentence. i just froze and stuttered and nothing i felt could be formed into any type of coherent sentence. it's the first time i ever felt that vulnerable. my throat tightened and my heart quickened and i thought i was going to die.. and it was in front all these admirable, confident people, absolutely sure that this is what they want to do because they've already experienced it all. absolute strangers. i don't know if i was just intimidated by all their success, or if what i was sharing really just got to me for the first time. i can't believe this is only the 4th day. i'm fuckin exhausted. 12:00 a.m. - 2009-09-18 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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